Monday, April 15, 2013

Today was odd

This was a very strange day.

After last Thursdays U/S that saw a large sac and nothing else (except there is still a lot of blood in my uterus) we collectively decided it was time to be done. So I scheduled another high res u/s and a d&c for today, essentially back to back.

I never made it to the d&c. Instead, there was a fetal pole and a heartbeat. But not an especially rapid one. It's likely to still go south based on the low hr (it's 65 - it's really low), but I was certainly in no position to terminate this pregnancy today.

The sac is low, almost near my cervix, and there is a lot of blood above it, but my cervix is log and closed and nothing is coming out.

The head of obstetric ultrasound who told me I was miscarrying two weeks ago was a bit abashed, but it still is a real long shot. All I can say is that my body Really wants to hold on to this pregnancy. And maybe that and a lot of luck will get us by.  I'm doubtful, as the prognostic indicators are not great, but his is already such a long shot on top of a long shot, I don't even know what to think any more. 

13 comments:

  1. Oh, fucking hell. Why can't you just get definitive good news. I'm so sorry for continued limbo and yes would be cautious, too based on heartrate. But there's a baby in there. And possibility. I'm hoping. so hoping.

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  2. Sending you lots of love and support. ((Hugs))

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  3. Holy shit! Heartbeat! I know it's a long shot-- but as you said, a long shot on top of a long shot, well, they almost cancel each other out, right? I'm hoping so hard... and if this works out, it will do a lot to restore my faith in the justice of the universe! In the meantime, I'm wishing you courage and distractions for what continues to be an awful wait.

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    1. p.s. Penelope had a very slow heartbeat at my 6w u/s-- around 60 bpm. Obviously it worked out...

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  4. Wow--the roller coaster ride continues. Sending you lots of love and hope.

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  5. Hoping that things improve for you soon.

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  6. Sending love and good wishes for the best possible outcome. I cannot imagine being in that particular emotional limboland and I can only say I want for you clearly great news next time you check.

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  7. Oh my GOD. I've seen some incredible miracles in this community, and I am desperately hoping yours is the next one. Sending loads of love and hope.

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  8. All of my fingers and toes are crossed for you. Hang on little embryo and grow grow grow!

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  9. so sorry for the roller coaster you are on...but sending you all of my thoughts that this little one can beat the odds!

    Mo

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