It's 4am; where else would a new mom be?

It is 4am and I am awake and hooked up to my breast pump sitting in our darkened living room. And bored, so posting via blackberry seems like a good way to while away the time.

B is asleep, after much wrangling - I think I swaddled and then unswaddled about 4 times, which may be a record. Long gone are the days (yeah, that's funny - the kid is only 54 days old) where we could swaddle a wide awake babe and place him in his crib, where he would drift off to sleep without a peep. Now there is rocking, and shushing and rubbing to induce drowsiness before he is put to bed. And if he's not yet ready? He will fight like hell to get out of the wrap, and grunt and cry until you liberate him. And sometimes (as in tonight, I *think* he's ready to sleep well before he actually is. But now, and hopefully for the next 5 hours or so, he's asleep. The video monitor shows him sleeping peacefully.

And I'm not complaining - he is a wonderful sleeper and usually is asleep from around 8-9pm until 2-3am and then until 7-8am. So while it's a long wakeup, it's only one. Of course I am up to pump at 1 and then after he goes to sleep at 4, so I get extra time awake, but its worth it to me to get him the good stuff to eat.

And on that, thanks to all of you for your comments - very much appreciated. I'll be emailing a couple of you for LC recs - I've seen two, but am open to more views to get this sorted - I am on mat leave until July so there is plenty of time to feed full time.

And on that, the latching seems to have improved - it is nearly pain free at this point - he was causing these vasospasms (basically draining the blood flow by compressing) and then for an hour or so afterwards there was pretty excruciating pain as blood flow came back.think of when your toes get really cold and then you warm them. And then put that feeling onto your nipple. It was not awesome.) But he's still not getting enough, as evidenced by another feedathon that resulted in him still rooting around looking for more. So right now, we have a supply shortfall, but I'm hopeful that it is solveable.

Ok - pumping done. I'm off to bed. I hope he stays sleeping!!