Several of my close friends know that I have been unsuccessfully trying to get pregnant. But they don't really know what to say, so it's either nothing or not so helpful things like "how's the babymaking going?" (while their toddler is screaming in the background).
But I can't rely on my husband all of the time, and I don't really love the support group I found here (through RESOLVE. More on that another time.)
So I emailed my best friend, my friend who moved away last year because she was pregnant with her second child and their apartment was too small. My friend whose entire life (since she stopped working) is related to her two kids. My friend who was just in town and knew I wasn't drinking b/c she brought wine and I politely demurred, but didn't pry as to where things were in the process.
So I emailed her yesterday and said "hey, are you around? I've had a shitty week and could use some help getting out of my bad mood." Not very IF specific, but since it's the biggest thing going on, you might guess that's what's up.
This is what I got back:
"Of course. I’m hoping that today I will actually get both children to nap at the same time. But tonight I’ll be around and more easily freed of childrens."
Is it bad that I no longer want to talk to this friend about this? I'm trying to find people who I think will "get it" but it's more and more clear to me that really no one does.
I'm just feeling very isolated, and while some of it is self-imposed, I don't know how to bridge the gap with my friends who were lucky enough just to get pregnant and have kids.
I'm willing to hear ideas. What did you do to explain to your non-IF friends how you were feeling?
Friday, April 30, 2010
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