Settling in for the long wait

I wish I could hibernate and when I woke up the baby would be ready to come out into the world. Because this part of pregnancy? This part is starting to be a bit on the suck-ola side. (Feel free to stop reading if this makes you want to hurl. I am still incredibly grateful and so so excited, but I'm feeling a wee bit entitled to a bit of a whine.)

My pregnancy compromised immune system and lack of decent sleep have caused -- get this -- an outbreak of shingles. Because it's not enough to have to get up 3x a night to pee. I now need to stay up trying desperately not to rip my own skin off with itching. I'm doing better now than I was earlier this week, but on Wednesday as I was trudging through the snow and slush after my diagnosis, I was pretty precariously balanced on that ragged edge between reason and meltdown. I just was worried that the shingles or the associated treatment would be bad for the little one. But apparently not, and as long as this is cleared up by the time I deliver (which it should be -- it should be cleared up within a week) I will not have to be quarantined from my newborn baby. I'm slathered with calamine lotion and doing a good job of not scratching, and am pleased that I have yet to have a crying meltdown over this. Because this part of pregnancy is hard, and the itching and worry about some random disease? Not making it easier.

My baby (Can I say that? Is it really a baby yet? Holy shit, every time I think about what is actually IN there I start to freak out a wee bit that I am nearly 36 weeks pregnant...) is breech. Head is right in the middle, some appendages with sharp points are on my right side and every once in a while something hard pokes my bladder/ cervix. I've discussed with my OB trying to flip the baby, and we'd both prefer not to, as she's seen too many of these attempts end up in emergency c-sections because there was a good reason the babies were breech. I've also gone to acupuncture 2x and burned that stinky stuff over my little toes at home. I only did that once, though, as it made everyone in the house, to include the dog, nauseated. But head is still up. I'm not even going to go into how I think that head up means that something is wrong, as I've tried to put those fears to rest. But they are there, just lurking waiting for a moment of weakness.

Breech means (for me, at least) heartburn. The heartburn is killing me. Water, bread, lettuce -- they all cause it, mostly because there is just a tremendous amount of pressure upwards from the little one's head. It is without a doubt my least favorite part of pregnancy. I'll trade the gagging for the reflux/ heartburn. I'm not even kidding.

Snow. Enough, people. We've had snow, sleet, ice way more than usual, and that has made commuting to work scary and hard. It just wipes me out, and so today I am working from home. I could use a bit of a break on the weather so that I am not so exhausted just by getting to work.

Oh -- and my shower is this weekend (more on that later). Which is very exciting and I have friends coming in from all over (Texas, people, they are flying in from as far away as Texas!), but I have (a) this icky looking rash on my neck which is not very nice for photos and (b) since there is the possibility of giving people chicken pox if they haven't had them, two people have had to drop out. One has never had chicken pox or the vaccine (this is just crazy -- she has two little kids!) and one was going to bring her 3 week old, as she is nursing. But the baby shouldn't be too near me, so now she can't make it. But I am excited about the shower and think that it still will be loads of fun. But shingles is complicating my life unnecessarily and I resent that.

OK -- I feel better now, a bit, after venting. But still itchy.